Owning your Wings ~

Spread Eagle, Burning Man 2008. (photo by hubby Richard Cave)
Thank you friends, for all the positive mojo! It really really meant the world to us.
I wish I could tell you that my green card was approved in the interview. But not so easy. Not for this gypsy. Not yet. On the other hand, our interview went really well and I know that it will all work out eventually. The hold up is related to a previous application I had in progress, via my employment sponsorship. Although everything is squared away with that application as well, Immigration still needs to put both applications together in order to make a decision on my case.
Oh well. As Rich said, it was all very anti climatic. Something we did not expect. We were both very anxious to get an approval on the spot and be done with this chapter… But alas, it wasn’t in the cards for us. I’m kind of used to the fact that with me, it is always the long way around. I am good at it. I have the patience and the determination. It’s also true that I burst into tears now and then, in disappointment. But in the end, it all works out for the best. So we’ll see what happens. We are supposed to hear back within the next 60 days. I know… 60 more days? However, the big picture is that I have been here for 13 years, always legally… And always in some sort of process… Which means I’ve waited many rounds of 60 days and that wait has never stopped me from living my dreams. I went from graduate school to a job in the film industry. I went from East to West, around the globe and back. I am still here. I own my wings no matter what. My freedom is within. If anyone had whined to me 15 years ago that it was going to be this hard to create a life abroad, I would have whined back and stayed home. I would have passed on the chance to live this crazy beautiful life that is mine now.
I’m telling you, friends. I have been unleashed!
Two serendipitous lessons knocked on my door on the day of the interview, with the same message: Freedom is within.
First, I opened Anthea Paul’s oracle book on the following quote:
“On the other side of FEAR is FREEDOM. Only when you feel that you are truly free you can be creative, happy and fulfilled in life. The process of understanding your own heart is the process of moving through fear into the freedom of unconditional love and happiness”.
No joke!
And second, “from the universe”, I got the following note:
“There are really only two conditions of the human mind: Very, very happy. Or about to become very, very happy. Which one are you today, Gypsy?”
I thought. Holy shit! YES! I’m about to become very very happy. Of course, I’m going to get my visa.
Boooooo. Wrong Answer.
Now I know. Now that I didn’t get what I thought I would… Now I get it.
I get that we should always ALWAYS let go of expectations.
I get that, regardless, I am still very very happy anyway. Just as is.
I get that not having this “thing” has never stopped me in any way.
I get that I have wings and they’ve taken me places. And they always will.
And I get that my freedom really is in the way I lead my life.
With my heart open ~
How about you? Is it time for you to own your wings and spread them open?
For more wing talk go…
& to check out Tango Baby spreading her wings, go here and buy her new book!

  • YES! Fly, beautiful Gypsy Girl, you Peaceful Warrior, fly!

  • Well, I am with you on the green card as I’ve just spent my 60 days in trepidation, after having had to send in MORE information for the second time, proving that my marriage is indeed legit. Of course none of this was helped by me feeling very nervous (and even guilty) about our decision to live our married life on opposite coasts for a couple of years. Anyway, my conditional card expires in a few days and yesterday I finally received the new, permanent, one! And so will you!! It’s a tedious process but there is NO reason to not grant you permanent residency and you know this and your positive attitude is spot on :)
    And those photos, wow, they are sooo cool and beautiful!

  • love this. just love your words here and your determination and your truth.
    and that second photo…the shadow! i love how the shadow looks like you are already flying high above the earth.

  • Dearest Alex, You are right about your wings and I know they will take you wherever you want to go. And you’ll get that bureaucracy sorted, I just know it!
    And can I just say that you look like a goddess and/or super-hero in that photo!
    Missing you. xoxox

  • Hey Alex. love the photos!
    “owning your wings” – such a beautiful phrase and meaning.
    You own your wings, no matter what. Getting a green card is only a matter of time.And time can never be a reason for not feeling a “free” person.
    Take care!

  • OH I love those photos, you are Mercury personified (as a beautiful woman of course) the winged messenger of promises kept and miracles to come! I have spread my own wings this week, with a new and crazy project I am dreaming up… more to tell!

  • Oh, man. I just love this. You are so awesome! So strong. So beautiful. I’ve had my wings tucked for too long. Thanks for this reminder!

  • What a beautiful post (I love the photo, too!) and you are so courageous and brave. You have so much wisdom to share with us. All of us need to remember the lesson you are sharing today.
    Thank you so much for the shout-out too. Being on the photographic path together, that’s a nice thing to be.

  • Oh, man. I just love this. You are so awesome! So strong. So beautiful. I’ve had my wings tucked for too long. Thanks for this reminder!

  • These photos are amazing Gypsy! AMAZING!! Indeed,everything points toward unfurling and flying…I’m learning how to soar too!

  • While reading your words the word ‘powerful’ came into my mind..which reminded me of an angel card reading I had a few months back.
    It said that to want to have/feel in control of a situation is fearbased…where as when you imagine/feel ‘power’…it comes from love!
    Trusting the process, hey?
    Having fun in the meantime! Love your heart being wide wide open! xx

  • i keep coming back to this space to read your words and look at this fabulous PHOTO.
    i feel your frustration, and yet at the same time am nodding yes yes to all the positive thoughts that are manifesting as well.
    sending you all good things alex. you rock!!!
    mccabe x

  • First of all, you are as free as you THINK you are!
    Manifest that Green Card baby!
    Second, what a cool photo of you looking all powerful.
    I love it!

  • missing you and your posts….

  • Oh, I so know what you are going through. Hang in there. This process is slow but it will be worth it.
    And is this YOU??! Holy moley, woman, you look awesome! Wings is a good accessory on you. :)

  • Man, I really want to go to Burning Man. You look like a giant hood ornament in that photo.

  • i love your experiences of burning man… you posted a burning man survival guide but I can not find it.. iam heading to burning man this year, my first and i do not know what to expect. excited, apprhensive, mixed emotions but lifechanging.. any advices?

Post a Comment