GYPSY GIRL'S GUIDE

I'm taking small gentle steps...

toward the Holidays reds and "blues"

toward true kindness and compassion for me and others

toward a more centered way of dealing with challenges

toward the possibility of making money doing something I love

toward figuring out what it is that I love to do

toward more self confidence

toward bringing more balance into my routine

toward a simpler and fuller life

toward accepting everything exactly as is

toward learning to let go... over and over again

toward the diligence to just start over

toward feeling less guilty for leaving

toward finally getting my green card and the freedom to choose my life's work

toward truly embracing my life as an immigrant

toward claiming new dreams

toward learning how to ask for help

toward being comfortable with "not knowing"

toward the brave & free spirit I used to be

toward making my life matter

toward mapping this world of color and light inside me.

toward finding a way of expressing what is inexplicable, immaterial, vast, ethereal, profound...

toward defining and dissecting what fills me... with such longing.

toward living and loving, exquisitely aware.

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Wishing you Holidays filled with LOADS of

Snuggles, Love, Light, Hope...

And Spicy Tender Ginger Cookies!

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All of our dreams are already coming true!

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Yay! Comments are working again!

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People Who Live
by Erica Jong

People who live by the sea
understand eternity.
They copy the curves of the waves,
their hearts beat with the tides,
& the saltiness of their blood
corresponds with the sea.

They know that the house of flesh
is only a sandcastle
built on the shore,
that skin breaks
under the waves
like sand under the soles
of the first walker on the beach
when the tide recedes.

Each of us walks there once,
watching the bubbles
rise up through the sand
like ascending souls,
tracing the line of the foam,
drawing our index fingers
along the horizon
pointing home.

Sparkling Girls, northeast of Brazil, 2007.

Thank you so much for your warm welcome back! You are all such sweethearts!

The weird thing is that after I posted, some strange emotions started to arise such as: "I'm so damn rude to show off happiness. To go away and then return proclaiming so much joy? That is not fair and people will hate you for that. Don't you know people have a life? Children and husbands to care for... A lousy boss to report to... A bank account and bills to keep up with... An infinite number of errands to run? You are so selfish. How can you recommend them to drop everything and run to a deserted island? Like that was even a solution for the world's problems..."

Oh boy. That is to say the least. My inner demons are not easy on me. But I went on with my business at home pretending to forget. Kissing my honey and smiling, but truly just burning with those horrible thoughts inside, planning when exactly, I would go back and delete that outrageous entry... Hopefully soon enough, I thought, and before that one commenter would write: How dare you?

Then, I opened a book about miracles... Ahhh... And I found a revelation that maybe you can also relate to:

"our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate,
our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
it is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
we ask ourselves: who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
actually, who are you not to be?
your playing small does not serve the world.
there is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
we are all meant to shine, as children do.
we were born to make manifest the glory that is within us.
it's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
and as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give others permission to do the same.
as we're liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others."
A Return to Love, Marianne Williamson

I can't help but wonder now...

Does that ever happen to you?
Are you embarrassed to be happy or successful sometimes?
Are you timid when it comes to feeling pleasure?
Are you shy about your accomplishments?
Do you have a hard time accepting your joy?
Are we too comfortable feeling pain and frustration?
Are we pushing happiness away by thinking it should be a "quick fix" instead of a lifelong experience?
Do we interrupt happiness with our guilt feelings (creating then DRAMA!)?
If we give ourselves permission to feel joy and happiness, will we get more of it?

I'm sharing my joy with you! Take some! Bring me some!

Let's start a JOY MOVEMENT!

Joy loves company too! =D

Sorry for my long absence, dear readers... It's just that...

Well...

I know I should have at least posted a note to say I was okay... Sorry. But before I knew it, I was gone.

The thing is that...

I was overwhelmed by a need of "less talk and more action"!

I felt that I was over thinking everything.

I felt that I was overstimulated by the "wonderful lives of others" (and their battles too...).

I felt that I needed to clear my head and create space for the next step, the next job, the wedded life, the new year...

I felt that I had lost sight of my own magic!

I felt that I just needed to find silence and look inside.

***

The truth is that I really thought about blogging and updating everyone many times...

But...

I felt that this time was not to be lived and shared. It was just to be lived.

I felt like moving, not sitting in front of the computer.

I felt the need to get out of the room to go outside, breathe fresh air, dive in salty water, walk walk walk...

I felt the need to talk in person.

I felt the need to be one

with my deepest thoughts, fears, dreams...

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The good news is that this is by far the best time of my life. Everything is falling perfectly into place! Everything that is happening makes sense. And I never thought I'd say this so firmly and so soon: I am truly living a life I love!

After all... How lucky am I to be able to unplug just like that?

Unplug:

1. to remove a plug or stopper from.
2. to free of an obstruction; unclog.
3. to disconnect
4. to remove from an outlet.
5. to become unplugged.

Ever tried to completely unplug from phones, tv, radio, mail, driving? It's total freedom I assure you! And you will unclog all the energy streams and detox too!

During this time away I was reminded of how much I enjoy this sensation of disconnecting from the "ever so plugged in" world. To be faraway, in remote places, surrounded by village kids, simplicity, color, and preferably, with the sun kissing my shoulders... That is real bliss!

That to me is living fully, without distractions.

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In my return home though, I also got the confirmation that I definitely entered a "nesting" phase! Even though my gypsy heart loves an adventure, it is at my home in San Francisco that I am finding my comfy zone. I am learning how to be home and to manage all the time I have to do all the things I love... And to be still. To be productive and at the same time at ease... I'm just loving what I have right here: the quietness, my studio, delicious food, my favorite yoga studios nearby, the house itself and all its colorful rooms, the routine of waiting for RC to come home and eat dinner with me... the list goes on...

The journey continues...

My goal is to keep on taking more photos, making more art, writing more wildly and living even more fully and aware. My goal is to begin a new career and continue with the blogging.

So here I am.

ALIVE!

Feeling whole.

AND ALSO

Planning my wedding...

YES!

In Mexico - But of course, a proper gypsy needs a destination wedding! ;P

(so much for the nesting talk...)

Here are some yummy links I found while researching wedding stuff recently:

Wedding Photography: Leigh Miller
Pure "eye" candy! She inspires me because she quit her job a year or so ago to pursue her artistic dreams. Look at the fantastic results!!! Too bad I can't afford her : (

Amazing boutique hotel in Mexico:
A pink bohemian dream!!

a Yoga Haven
Interested Anyone???

More news and pics to come soon...

HUGSSSS